How Deep Does Connection Go ?

Here is my own experience of how deep connection with horses can be.
This isn’t just something I’ve read or heard from others — it’s what I have personally felt, many times. I wasn’t always able to have this depth of connection, it is something that evolved for me, so I think it is a learnable skill that I endeavour to teach people. I think it is the level that horses innately operate at and perhaps it is also innate in us and we had it as small children and then lost it. So maybe it’s more a case of remembering it than experiencing something new.

There are different types of connection, and in some ways Feel and Connection can be interchangeable.

1. Physical Connection

Through touch — what we might also call physical feel. The quality of our physical feel and touch has a big effect on the horse. The quality of our feel tells the horse a lot about us and where we are mentally, emotionally, and physically.

2. Mental Connection

When the horse is truly attentive to you — even to the point of picking up on your thoughts and intentions — you have a strong mental connection. We can then take this to the next level of “doing or feeling in your body what you want the horse to do” and having the horse mirror you — even at liberty, with no physical contact at all.

This is one of the biggest pieces in my training, especially in the postural work. I’m talking about doing very subtle things that many people may not even see you do — subtle internal changes in the body, like lengthening your sacrum, for example. Of course, this requires a very high level of body awareness, but that is something I can, and do, teach people to develop. We need this level of body awareness to be a great rider, so we might as well start learning it on the ground.

I’m not sure if this fits entirely within the category of mental connection — in many ways, all the categories merge into one — but it’s the best place I could think to put it. This is one of the most important components of what I teach in postural development. Science would probably explain it as mirror neurons. I don’t know how to fully explain it — I do think it’s more than mirror neurons. The important thing, and all that really matters, is that it works, and is a very powerful influencer once we learn how to focus and hold the feelings in our bodies.

When we take thoughts and intentions to the level of feelings in the body, it amplifies things immensely. It’s visualisation on steroids.

3. Emotional Connection

Feeling the horse’s emotions — sadness, anger, anxiety, or fear — along with the physical sensations that come with them:

• A tight, clenched jaw

• A lump in the throat

• Tightness in the abdomen or sacral area

• Restricted breathing, followed by a deep breath when the horse takes one

To me, this is attunement at its deepest — feeling the other.
Sometimes people pick up these emotions without realising they’re coming from another being, and instead interpret them as their own.

4. Energetic Connection

When we are still enough and aware enough (a skill we can all develop), we can feel the horse’s energy and the energy fields around them.

For example:

• A horse’s energy field may feel soft and open, inviting me in.

• Or it may feel harsh, closed, and blocking.

• The feel can change in different areas of the body — they may welcome me near the front end, but resist me walking past the wither.

Sometimes, I feel a horse putting up a wall of energy, blocking me from approaching.
If I pause, acknowledge their request to stop, centre myself, ground, and breathe more deeply — they will often drop the wall and let me in.

This has happened often in clinic situations. (A completely wild or extremely traumatised horse may not change so quickly.)

5. Spiritual Connection

For me, this is a deeper sense of knowing — beyond mental or emotional connection.

It’s the sacred thread that binds all living beings.
It’s acknowledging the deeper essence — the soul — within them.
It’s the life force that:

• Breathes them

• Makes them alive instead of lifeless

• Shapes their unique individuality

I see the soul as carrying the blueprint of memories, experiences, desires, and values we are born with — before the experiences of this lifetime add new layers.

Honouring the Soul

Spiritual connection means having deep respect and honour for the life force in another being — knowing they are just as valuable and equal as yourself in walking this planet.

When we recognise another’s spiritual being, it lifts them.
It elevates them.
Their personality shines more positively.
They know when you see them at this level, and they know you care.

I love the Sanskrit word Namaste — often translated as:

“The spirit in me greets the spirit in you.”

To me, this means: I see the deeper you.

Questions I Always Ask

• Who is our horse underneath the hair, skin, bone, and flesh?

• And how are they?

When we ask with an open mind and no agenda, we start to truly sense who our horses are and how they feel.

Sometimes, we may even pick up on memories or experiences that make up their soul — and sense their purpose here on earth.

Acknowledging trauma can be part of healing it.
I’ve seen big, dangerous behaviours disappear overnight after deep trauma was released and healed.

Animal Communication

This deep sensing is a form of animal communication.
It can come in many forms:

• Pictures

• Words or thoughts

• Feelings or sensations

• Simply “knowing”

Higher Self & Lower Self

I believe all beings have a higher self (soul) and a lower self, and they can operate from either.

In times of stress or trauma, horses — like people — struggle to access their higher self.
Many horses today carry deep trauma, losing connection to that higher self.

When we see or acknowledge them as their higher self, we help them:

• Transcend the grip of trauma

• Reconnect with their deeper, authentic, higher self

Finding Balance

Connection at all levels is what I aspire to.

Energetic levels of connection/communication do not replace physical communication — body language, touch, or voice cues — because we are physical beings, the physical aspects are equally important.

I believe horses are masters of reading and sensing energy, so when we can tap into that level of communication and connection we are getting on the same page as them. Whilst many say body language is the universal language, I believe the language of energy precedes it and always comes first – then the body just follows the energy. Our thoughts, intentions and emotions are all forms of energy and energetic communication.

My aim is to be balanced, and to keep improving in every aspect of connection, communication, and feel.